The 100-Year Table

How to run a table.

One question at a time. One person speaking at a time. It takes about forty-five minutes, and no one has to prepare anything. Bring your actual monthly figures — or don’t. Counting together is what the hour is for.

Watch first — then everything below is the same thing in writing.

The four objects

The Question Deck40 cards in three tiers, drawn in order.
The Steward’s CoinsOne each. Hold yours to speak; put it down to pass.
The Family CharterSigned at the end of your first session.
Press PlayThe narration that runs the session so you do not have to.
The Rules of the Table
  1. 1.Whoever holds the coin speaks. Everyone else listens.
  2. 2.Nothing said at this table is used against anyone later.
  3. 3.No advice unless it is asked for.
  4. 4.We can stop at any time. We come back anyway.

Running the session

  1. 01
    Press play before you begin.Scan the QR card in the box, or open the table on your phone. A voice opens the session so nobody in the family has to be the one running it.
  2. 02
    Put the coins out.One coin per person. Whoever holds their coin is speaking; everyone else is listening. When they are done, the coin goes down and the floor is open again. That single rule is what makes the rest of it safe.
  3. 03
    Draw one card at a time.Read it out loud. Everyone answers before the next card is drawn — including the person who drew it. Do not stack up two questions; the whole point is that one question gets a real answer.
  4. 04
    Start at the top of the deck.The cards are numbered, and the order is deliberate: easy questions first, and the ones that need trust last. A first session usually gets through four or five cards. That is a good session.
  5. 05
    Sign the charter.At the end of your first session, everyone signs. It is not a legal document — it is the family saying out loud that this happens again.
  6. 06
    Open the sealed envelope last.Card 40, The First Move, is the only card that asks the family to do something instead of say something. Open it when the talking is done, and answer it before anyone leaves the table.
In the same roomUse the box. Deck in the middle, a coin in front of each person, the charter in the lid until the end.See the box
In four different kitchensGet on whatever call you already use, then open the table on each phone. The deck, the coins, and the charter stay in sync. Free, no account.Set a table
On your printerPrint all 40 cards at home tonight — the full deck as a free PDF, with the rules and how to run the dinner.Print the deck

All 40 cards

The deck as it ships, face down. Tap any card to turn it over. Nothing here is a spoiler — a family that knows the questions still has to answer them.

Tier I · Cards 1–12Where We Come From
Tier II · Cards 13–30What We Believe
Tier III · Cards 31–40What We Do Next

You talked about money. The Family Assessment tells you whether this family is built to hold what it earns.

Take the Family Assessment

A safe place to talk about money.

The 40 questions

  1. First Purchase — What's the first thing you remember buying with your own money?
  2. The Allowance — How did money show up in your childhood — allowance, chores, envelopes, nothing at all?
  3. Dream Splurge — If money were no object for one day, how would you spend it?
  4. The Jar — Where did your family keep money when you were growing up?
  5. Best Dollar — What's the best money you've ever spent, at any price?
  6. Worst Dollar — What purchase do you still laugh about regretting?
  7. Rich Means — When you were ten, what did you think "rich" looked like?
  8. The Gift — What's a gift someone gave you that mattered more than it cost?
  9. Payday Ritual — What's the first thing you do when money comes in?
  10. The Table — Who taught you the most about money — on purpose or by accident?
  11. Small Luxury — What's a small thing you'll always pay for without guilt?
  12. The Trade — What would you trade a year of spending for — more time, more peace, or more freedom?
  13. The Worth — When have you felt most valued for your work — and was money part of it?
  14. Enough — What would "enough" actually look like for you?
  15. The Ask — Tell about a time you asked for more — or wish you had.
  16. Hidden Work — What work do you do that no one pays you for?
  17. The Pattern — What do you spend on when you're stressed?
  18. Quiet Purchase — What's something you bought and never mentioned to anyone?
  19. The Standard — What did your family always insist on buying the good version of?
  20. Generosity — When has giving money away felt right — and when has it felt complicated?
  21. The Worry — What's a money worry you've never said out loud at this table?
  22. The Lesson — What money mistake taught you the most?
  23. The Silence — What money topic does this family avoid — and why do you think that is?
  24. If Tomorrow — What money question would you want answered if something happened to you tomorrow?
  25. The Comparison — When has comparing yourself to others cost you peace?
  26. The Inheritance — What money habit did you inherit that you'd like to keep?
  27. The Break — What money habit did you inherit that you'd like to break?
  28. The Check-In — How often do you actually look at your money — and how does it feel when you do?
  29. The Teacher — What do you hope the youngest person at this table learns about money from you?
  30. The Apology — Is there a money moment in this family you wish had gone differently?
  31. The Hundred Years — What do you want this family to be known for a hundred years from now?
  32. The Values — If this family's money had to follow three rules, what would they be?
  33. The Safety Net — What would it feel like to know this family catches each other?
  34. The Celebration — What milestone should this family celebrate together that money could make possible?
  35. The Next One — What do you want to make easier for the next generation than it was for you?
  36. The Promise — What's one thing you're willing to commit to after tonight?
  37. The First Brick — If this family started building one thing together, what should it be?
  38. The Pool — If everyone here put a little in each month, what would you want it to become in ten years?
  39. One Table — What becomes possible if this family manages money as one, instead of everyone alone?
  40. The First Move — You've talked about it. What's the first move this family makes together — starting this week?